The picture in my head.
I'm so very old, and so very grey.
I had imagined that My Jamie would be buried between MyFella and I.
Once we got married I realized I would probably change my plans for burial. I wouldn't be taken back to my home town and buried on the hill. In the Winter when leaves drop you can see past the levee to a grey murky Mississippi River rolling. But when MyFella and I married I started thinking that when we were old and grey he would be buried near Jamie, and so I to them.
"He'll be buried between his parents. They already have the spots." Hell, they already had the stone.
Still, I thought I would be so very old, so very grey. That time would have at least worn me down and have me near ready.
No. April came and life changed, and My Jamie is buried next to his father.
If I search for the text it probably says something like, "It's not urgent, but please call the person who sells the plots."
The person met the other brother the afternoon after the funeral. He had a paper in his hand and kept turning it, trying to orient himself to the plots. "The ones next to your dad are open."
I need two of them.
I took one of MyFella's checks and paid him.
I called my mom and told her I wouldn't be brought home. That I bought a plot next to My Jamie. That MyFella would lay me down near My Jamie.
"I probably won't ever make it there." I should outlive you anyway. She understands.
I told MyFella that he should be buried next to their dad and me next to MyFella. MyFella says whoever goes first goes down next to their dad. In this way we'll both get what he want, I'll put him next to his dad or he will put me.
In all honesty I want to be buried with My Jamie. Next to him, beside him, move him 12 feet down and put me marker less 6 feet. I want the shell that held me to be as close to My Jamie as possible.
That will fade, I'm sure. The rawness, the hurt, the empty feeling. It should fade some in time.
I'll buy a double headstone for MyFella and I. He wants a flat one so the mower can just ride right over us. He's sensible like that when it comes to mowing.
My soul will whisper to their dad and tell him I finally moved to their town. He never understood why I live in the city. Every time I left he thought it was ridiculous to live in the city. Finally one day I will move there for good.
I had imagined that My Jamie would be buried between MyFella and I.
Once we got married I realized I would probably change my plans for burial. I wouldn't be taken back to my home town and buried on the hill. In the Winter when leaves drop you can see past the levee to a grey murky Mississippi River rolling. But when MyFella and I married I started thinking that when we were old and grey he would be buried near Jamie, and so I to them.
"He'll be buried between his parents. They already have the spots." Hell, they already had the stone.
Still, I thought I would be so very old, so very grey. That time would have at least worn me down and have me near ready.
No. April came and life changed, and My Jamie is buried next to his father.
If I search for the text it probably says something like, "It's not urgent, but please call the person who sells the plots."
The person met the other brother the afternoon after the funeral. He had a paper in his hand and kept turning it, trying to orient himself to the plots. "The ones next to your dad are open."
I need two of them.
I took one of MyFella's checks and paid him.
I called my mom and told her I wouldn't be brought home. That I bought a plot next to My Jamie. That MyFella would lay me down near My Jamie.
"I probably won't ever make it there." I should outlive you anyway. She understands.
I told MyFella that he should be buried next to their dad and me next to MyFella. MyFella says whoever goes first goes down next to their dad. In this way we'll both get what he want, I'll put him next to his dad or he will put me.
In all honesty I want to be buried with My Jamie. Next to him, beside him, move him 12 feet down and put me marker less 6 feet. I want the shell that held me to be as close to My Jamie as possible.
That will fade, I'm sure. The rawness, the hurt, the empty feeling. It should fade some in time.
I'll buy a double headstone for MyFella and I. He wants a flat one so the mower can just ride right over us. He's sensible like that when it comes to mowing.
My soul will whisper to their dad and tell him I finally moved to their town. He never understood why I live in the city. Every time I left he thought it was ridiculous to live in the city. Finally one day I will move there for good.
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